I had to have one. More specifically, Kevin had to have one. It was stinkin' genius.
I mean, Kevin already has a reputation around the neighborhood for his innovative attire: his dapper dressing. When he wears his Thunder Jacket, heads turn.
I can only imagine the reaction he'll receive when he wears his Doggone Thong.
The thing is Kevin's admiring observers have no clue that the Thunder Jacket's underlying objective is to reduce his fear of thunder, firecrackers and zombies.
Similarly, they will likely be surprised to discover that the Doggone Thong, also has "secret super-powers".
It effectively eliminates the unflattering aftermath of doggie flatulence. According to the marketing materials, the Doggone Thong is "a comfortable and unintrusive means for deodorizing gassy discharges in a thong design."
I was extremely disappointed to discover that the Doggone Thong was discontinued on the www.flat_d.com web site. But that did not stop me.
Because there's a Dollar Store only 10 minutes from my house!
And I am the Nerdling.
All I needed was some fabric, dryer sheets (to neutralize the gas), and some sort of elastic for the Doggie Thong waist band.
(For the record, Kevin denies that he has, ever has had, or ever will have gas.)
But you know what?
My innate sense of fashion, combined with all those episodes of Project Runway I've been watching, caused me to take the design up a notch.
I opted for the blue tulle tutu, rather than the boring elastic.
And, as you can see, I am a stinkin' Doggone Thong Design Star genius.
And, although Kevin would deny it, he smells even better than he looks.