Saturday, May 3, 2014

Notes from a Nerdling's Brother

When I saw my bother's  Facebook post I decided to ask him to be my guest blogger.

Of course, he agreed.  How could he not?

But when I asked him rather politely to take some photos to accompany the blog, he tuned all diva on me.  Something about having to check with his agent.  

At the risk of turning this into a big Khardishian brouhaha, I took the bulls by the horn, so to speak, and staged the photos myself.

(You're welcome, Tom.)

So here goes....

You know how sometimes you try to change your routine to spice up your life a bit? Maybe put orange rinds in your cottage cheese, or hide some bb's in your ice cream just for texture? 

One summer I went completely nuts and decided to have an intra-personal fingernail growing contest, just to see which index finger grew a faster and hardier nail. You'll never guess which one came out ahead and I'll never tell.

Well, today I decided to go off the charts and reverse the order in getting dressed. 

Lemme splain. 

For years I have stepped into my underwears left leg first, etc. Today I decided to put my right foot first. 

You'd think I had bumped the earth off its axis. I couldn't do it. I kept falling down. 

Finally I sat on a chair and got er done. Then I realized I had put them on backwards, so the vent was facing the outback, and the front was just plain cloth.

I'm one of those guys who doesn't use the vent anyway, but the underwears felt weird facing the wrong direction, so decided to start over and reinsert myself into the underwears. 

When I put them on rightside frontwards, I mindlessly went back to the old pattern. Left leg first, and it went just as smooth as you can imagine.

So tomorrow I recommend you try to put your underwears on in the reverse order and let me know if you fall down, or what. Thank you. I will report your findings to the universe.

I have a confession to make here.  I strongly adhere to the practice of transparency in journalism. If I lose my readers' trust, I am nothing but a nerdling blogger.  

My brother Tom is pictured in only one of the three photos in this blog.  

Angelina Jolie posed for the bottom two.

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