On one hand, I am distressed that I cannot add to my original collection of two. On the other hand, the laws of supply and demand tell me that my collection is priceless.
Over the years, I’ve had to relax my standards to add to my Drunken Mexican Toothpick Holder collection. I first added Fred, who actually was a toothpick holder.
But he was not Mexican, nor was he drunk. I gave him a sombrero and a bottle, greatly enhancing his credibility.
I was then able to double my Drunken Mexican Toothpick Holder collection when I got my hands on 3 Justin Bieber figurines.
And with some creative acupuncture treatments, I converted them into 3 rather impressive toothpick holders.
(Admittedly, they are not Mexican, nor are they drunk, but they do hold toothpicks.)
My friend Jamie got my collection back on track by creating an original Drunken Mexican Toothpick Holder for me (see the Drunken Mexican in yellow hat, below). I added a naughty baby doll and I now own the largest collection of Drunken Mexican Toothpick Holders in the entire world: 8.
At the risk of sounding greedy, I feel the need to add to my Drunken Mexican Toothpick Holder collection.
The truth is, I’m hosting a holiday party in a few weeks and really want to impress my guests.
To that end, I scoured every booth in each and every Straw Market I could find on my recent trip to the Bahamas.
To no avail.
I realize that the Bahamas are nowhere near Mexico.
But what about a Drunken Bob Marley Toothpick Holder? Is that asking too much?
Not a single one.
This is ridiculous. Do I have to come up with EVERY idea? Come on, Straw Market people. Okay, I'll build the prototype.
You can take it from there.