Sunday, August 5, 2012

Becoming Yapper


I've got the biggest secret.


(I read about this in The State newspaper, so it is probably going to remain a secret.)

My secret is about the Bloods street gang. Apparently, they have their own secret lingo!

Don't tell anyone, but "wisdom" means crack cocaine. And "white girl" is powdered cocaine.  Please keep this to yourself.

And here are some more secret Blood words:
Purple: type of marijuana
Yappers, or yaps: Ecstacy pills
Zip: one ounce
The river: Broad River Road/Bush River Road area
Lick, or fox: A robbery
Do a ghost: leave the area

What a goldmine.

With this information I can be just like June Cleaver in Airplane!  You know, her famous “I speak jive” scene?

Next time I hear someone say, “I need to get me some zips of white girl at the river and do a ghost”, I will know exactly what it means. 

I will smugly smile, and nod my head knowingly.

And if the person he's talking to says, "Say again?" or, simply, "Huh?", I'll be able to help!   I will step up to them and say, "Excuse me. I speak Blood." 

How cool is that? 

Wait a stinkin' minute.  If the Bloods have their own lingo, why can't I?

I can invent my own nerdling lingo! Here's a start:

Wisdom: wine
Zip: a bottle
Zap: a bag
Orange Dog: Cheetos
Licking fox: Cast party
Slammer: grocery store
Yapper: Esctatic
Let’s try it. 
“I need to get me a zip of wisdom and a zap of White Dog at the slammer for the Licking fox.”

OMG. I am so yapper!  Pass the wisdom.

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