Friday, June 15, 2012

Maybe Next Time, Groupon

Um.

I don’t think so.

Let me start by saying that I’m the first person to buy a Groupon or a Living Social deal. $10 for $20 worth of cupcakes? Count me in! $15 for $30 worth of Mexican food and margaritas? Let me pull out my credit card!

But $29 for $200 worth of CrossFit or Kettlebell sessions? At an 86% discount?

Are you stinkin' crazy?

Look at that photo! I need to schedule a massage as a result of LOOKING at that thing.

It looks like a weapon Conan the Barbarian or some other medieval fighter would flail around in a battle between the Trojans and the Hatfields.

And what the heck am I supposed to do with a Kettlebell? Lift it up? Again and again?

Kettlebell, my foot.

How about KettleHELL?

Who invented that thing, anyhow? Adolph Hitler? Mussolini? And why would anyone want to lift it?

Well, maybe if there was $1,000 underneath it. 

Or tickets to a Broadway play.

According to Groupon, my time is running out.  I only have 1 day, 13:22:21…20…19..18. seconds left to buy my Kettlebell Groupon.

Well, guess what, Groupon.  Ain’t gonna happen. 

 If I’m lifting anything, it’s gonna be Marble Slab ice cream cone. 


Or a glass of wine.

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