The Masquerading Hairspray

When Linda broke the news I was shocked.  It did not seem possible.  How could I make such a critical error?

But the evidence was overwhelming.

Barbie was standing right next to the hairspray in the photo. (see posting: The Barbie Doll Experiment June 14, 2011)

But it wasn’t hairspray.   It was dry hair shampoo, masquerading as hairspray. How did I miss that yellow writing on the can?

It’s no stinkin’ wonder my experiment failed!   I couldn’t get that training bra to catch on fire no matter how much hairspray…make that dry hair shampoo I applied to the training bra. 

I even added dryer lint. 

To make matters worse, I completely unsparked my Barbie roller blades that day with all my fruitless attempts at creating a fire.  The blades twirl freely today, unencumbered by any friction.  No sparks.   

Duds.

And I'm relatively certain that Barbie’s laughing at me in this picture. She apparently knew I was using dry hair shampoo, and not hairspray.

Bitch.  

Yes.  I’m a failure.  And you know who’s to blame?

Me.  I guess I didn’t bring my reading glasses to Food Lion on my hairspray shopping trip that day.

But being the responsible Nerdling that I am, I have located a vintage Rollerblade Barbie on Amazon.com and have placed an order for her and her dangerous, sparking rollerblades.  When she arrives, I will properly conduct the experiment using REAL hairspray (Dave Berry recommends Rave).

You're welcome.

And if the hairspray doesn’t work, maybe I’ll try some Poop Freeze.  I understand that’s quite flammable.

In the meantime, I have to get busy.

I’m going to wash my hair.