Saturday, October 29, 2016

What do you need foam for?

"Can I help you?" asked the man at the fabric center.

"Yeah," I said.  "I'm looking for foam."

"Foam?  What kind of foam?"

"Um, foam.  Foam that you use to make pillows,"  I explained.

He told me that they didn't sell foam, but there was a place in nearby Conway that did.  "They'll cut it to the exact size you want."

Then he asked the question I was dreading. 

"What are you going to use it for?"

"You don't want to know," I said.

He gave me a look like, come on Lady.  I work in a damn Fabric Center.  I've seen everything.  You will not surprise me.  You think you're the only woman who's made a futon for her cat?

"You really don't want to know," I repeated.

He raised an eyebrow and started to walk away.

"Okay I'll tell you," I said.  "It's a prop for a play.  I'm making boob prostheses for a woman who just had a mammogram."

He stopped for a minute.  Then continued on his way to the back of the store.

"But they have to be rectangular," I said more loudly.  Because he really needed to hear this.  

"Cuz she just had a mammogram," I sad loudly.

"And both her boobs are squished into rectangles."

He shook his head. 

"That sounds hysterical," said the woman who was standing nearby.  (The one with a sense of humor.)

Who, clearly, had experienced more than her share of Mammograms.

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