Brainstorming Umbrellas

I just wish I was a fly on the wall in the Japan Trend Shop brainstorming session on umbrellas. 
 
They clearly followed the cardinal rule of brainstorming:  no idea is a bad one.

It probably went something like this.

Haruto says, “We could sell an umbrella shaped like an apple.   No!   That’s too ordinary.  How about the head of lettuce!”

 

Nobody says, “Who wants to carry an umbrella that looks like their lunch?”   

Instead we get this:

Then comes Kaito’s suggestion, “When it stops raining and you close your umbrella, it gets your clothes wet.  How about an umbrella that can be dragged on the ground so you stay dry?”

And Tatsuki says, “Let’s put wheels on it!"

Nobody says, "Why not just stick your wet umbrella in a plastic bag?"
 
Instead we get this:

Then Yomato says, “Why not put the wet umbrella to work??!!  Let’s make an umbrella stand with grass seed in the bottom?”

Nobody says, “Who wants to weed their umbrella stand?”

Instead we get this:

Then Ibuki says, “Speaking of bottom, why not make an umbrella that looks like you’re looking up a girls skirt from underneath it?”

Nobody says, “私をからかっている低寿命逸脱の種類あなたは?”   

Or the English translation,  “ARE YOU FREAKIN’ KIDDING ME WHAT KIND OF SKUM BAG DEVIANT ARE YOU?”

Instead we get this.