It’s really kind of embarrassing. Colgate and Crest have been utterly myopic in terms of product design.
They have been offering the same hapless assortments of white and pastel colored toothpaste, with flavors ranging from mint to baking soda for decades.
In the meantime, the Japanese have stepped out of the box with their cutting-edge Binotomo Nasu Dentifrice Jet Black Toothpaste.
Not only does it “leave your pearly whites feeling super clean”, it’s good for you! It contains eggplant.
To be honest, getting my minimum daily requirement of vegetables is a constant struggle for me. And I can think of no more convenient way to consume my daily eggplant servings than via my toothpaste.
Wait. One. Minute. I just noticed that there is a warning on the Binotomo Nasu Dentifrice Jet Black Toothpaste box. “Be careful when you squeeze out the Binotomo Nasu Dentifrice Jet Black Toothpaste, though, as the eggplant-based paste can stain clothes.”
Whatever. I’m not going to worry about that. I have never accidentally squeezed toothpaste onto my clothes.
Wait. Another. Minute. Although I have never accidentally squeezed tooth paste onto my clothes, I have accidentally dribbled tooth paste from my mouth onto my clothes.
And, at the risk of ruining my reputation as a polished and refined
Maybe Binotomo Nasu Dentifrice Jet Black Toothpaste is not for me, after all.
Besides, if Binotomo Nasu Dentifrice Jet Black Toothpaste can stain your clothes, how come it doesn’t stain your teeth?
I decided to do a bit more research on Japanese toothpaste.
I think I'll stick with the pastels.