Saturday, December 7, 2013

Wax On, Wax Off

"Mom, can I wax your lip?"

I heard 6 words come from Linda's mouth, but my brain refused to comprehend them.  I looked at her dully.

"Can I wax your lip?" she repeated. 

"NO!" I said firmly.   "I don't need my lip waxed."

"Yes you do," she said and handed me a mirror.  I looked.  "I don't have hair on my lip," I said confidently.

She handed me my reading glasses.  I looked.

I firmly believe that God makes our eyes go bad so we don't notice our flaws as we age.  Reading glasses are for reading.  Not for discovering that Kevin and I have similar lips.

I decided to consult with Dave, who also happens to be reliant on reading glasses.  

"Linda wants to wax my lip," I told him.  "Should I let her do it?"

"You have hair on your lip????"
  He seemed surprised.  That made me feel better, since, clearly, he had never noticed my hairy lip.

"Yes," I said, humiliated. 

But then he said, as if rubbing it in, "I don't have hair on MY lip."

Now, Dave has a full beard and mustache.  You don't need reading glasses to see that he has hair on his lip.

"Yes you do!"
"No, I don't"

And we proceeded to debate the ridiculous issue until it became clear to me that he thought I had hair ON my lip (as opposed to above it).  

I decided to let Linda get her wish.  I know.  Willingly allowing your daughter to inflict pain and suffering upon you in the name of beauty may not have been the best choice I've ever made.

But the before and after photos certainly are convincing.

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