Saturday, July 12, 2014
The Folds
When I first heard about the widespread outbreak of Nasolabial Folds in today's society I was distraught.
Admittedly, I had no early earthly idea what Nasolabial Folds were. Or even where they could be found. If I were to guess, I would say they would best be treated by a Gynecologist.
A Google search taught me that Nasolabial Folds are smile lines, similar to those sported by the Cowardly Lion. Thankfully, I don’t have Nasolabial Folds.
At least I didn’t think I did.
I went to the bathroom mirror, just to be certain. Whew. No Naslolabial Folds to be found.
Then, just for grins, I put on my reading glasses.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
My face shows the beginning of Nasolabial Folds. Which would not be a problem if everyone I hung out with had eyesight like mine.
But they don’t.
Thank God for the newest product on the Japan Trend Shop web site: Houreisen Tsumamin Smile Lines Clip Nasolabial Fold Cheek Anti-aging Exercise Tool.
According to the product description, all I have to do is fit this contraption onto my upper lip and wear it for 10 minutes a day!
That's amazing!
No more Cowardly Lion for me!
Except it costs $70 plus shipping.
Now, I do recognize that the Houreisen Tsumamin Smile Lines Clip probably costs way less than plastic surgery, but $70 for a binder clip is a lot of money.
To that end, I decided to make my own Nerdling Smile Lines Clip.
Oh... about those binder clips? I have one word.
Ouch.
So off I went to the Dollar Store in search of the perfect Nerdling Smile Lines Clip.
I test drove an assortment of chip clips. I was quite disappointed when the Lip Chip Clip didn’t work.
That would have been serendipitous. Actually, more like serenlipitous.
Sorry, couldn’t resist.
At the risk of being considered myopic in my lip clip engineering, I also test drove some hair clips and discovered that there is actually something more painful than a binder clip on your lip.
I finally arrived at the perfect Nerdling Smile Lines Clip.
And I'm happy to report that after 10 minutes, my Nasolabial Folds were completely gone.
But unfortunately, they migrated to my lips.
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