Mall Hair Girl

I survived my first Improv class. I (barely) maintained my dignity. We played some Improv games that pushed me well out of my comfort zone. At the end of the class, our teacher Vicky gave us a homework assignment. We were to keep our eyes open for interesting characters and observe them.

I found my interesting character. Mall Hair Girl Receptionist. She works (and I use that term loosely) at my doctor's office. I love my doctor. He's the nicest, most down-to-earth doctor I've ever met. In fact, everyone in his office is very nice...even the phelbotomist. Everyone, that is, except Mall Hair Girl.

I had to pick up a prescription today. I walked into the doctor's office and there she was.

I approached the counter with a smile, determined that I would not let her spoil my mood. Mall Hair Girl was staring at a computer screen, type-type-typing away. I said hi and gave her a friendly smile - a wasted friendly smile, since she didn't even glance my way.

"Yes, maaaaaaaaaaaaam", she sneered, as she continued to look at the computer screen (type-type-typing away).

"I'm here to pick up a prescription", I said.

"When did you call it in?" she grumbled, as she continued to look at the computer screen (type-type-typing away).

"My husband just called me and told me it was ready", I responded.

"When did you call it in?" she repeated, clearly annoyed that I hadn't answered her question the first time, as she continued to look at the computer screen (type-type-typing away).

"This morning."

She looked at me, snarled and huffed, as she got to her feet, probably for the first time that day.

I couldn't take my eyes off her bangs. They went straight up, defying gravity. In fact, she was three inches taller with those bangs than without them. I wondered how long it took her to get ready for "work" (again, I use that term loosely).

Then I remembered my Improv homework assignment and my entire attitude change. I'd found my subject! And it was like I was watching an amoeba under a microscope...well, make that a hairy rat in a maze. My imagination took over. I visualized her spraying the lacquer in her hair that morning.

I imagined Mall Hair Girl stopping at Food Lion to pick up some donuts, hair spray, and chewing tobacco, which made her late for "work". She made the first patient of the day, an 87-year old woman, wait for five minutes while she finished up her game of solitaire (which she lost). She was looking forward to her big date with her boyfriend Woody. She's hoping he invites her to go hunting with him in the morning.

"Maaaaaam!" What? Mall Hair Girl was talking to me.

Back to reality.

Mall Hair Girl handed me the prescription and said, "There. Get lost, now."

I gave her my sweetest smile and a sincere "Thank you very much!".

I can't wait for my next Improv class!