Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Graduation Day!

No more homework. No more books.
No more teachers’ dirty looks.

Kevin graduated.

It wasn’t easy. We thought he was going to have to take the canine version of the G.E.D.

Kevin’s academic career was checkered, to say the least. On day one the teacher pegged him as a trouble maker. He flunked Butt Sniffing 101; he had no interest in socializing with his classmates. We arranged for a tutor - Happy (of Cheaper by the Dozen fame)- to help him learn how to ‘play well with others’. Within a couple lessons Kevin was able to participate in recess without inflicting injury on his classmates.

Kevin was also challenged by the sit-stay command. It was by the skin of his needle teeth that he passed ‘Sit-Stay’ with a D-. He did quite well in ‘Leave It’, but he nearly flunked ‘Drop It’. His success in ‘Drop It’ is strongly correlated with the item he is to told to drop. Dropping a dry, unappetizing chew stick in class is one thing, but dropping a used Kleenex at home is quite different. And dropping a dead frog on a walk is near impossible. Thankfully, the ‘Drop It’ final exam utilized the dry, unappetizing chew stick and he eked by with a C.

Kevin’s juvenile delinquency was also a challenge. He wouldn’t sit still and liked to talk back to the teacher. Doggie detention didn’t seem to help. It wasn’t until the resource officer had a little talk with him about his future career in jail (and that he’d better hold on to the soap) that his attitude changed.

At any rate, Kevin has achieved what others thought impossible. He graduated from Puppy Kindergarten. His graduation ceremony went very well….except for the little gift he left in the aisle before receiving his diploma.

Oh well. Just a harmless graduation prank.

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